Turtle Toy

I let our dogs out this morning and left them out for about an hour, pretty much standard procedure. Maggie comes rushing back in, in her usual state of high excitement, with TJ following in a state of much more excitement than usual. Ordinarily, he's more of a plodder, but this morning he's dancing around as much as she is. That's when I noticed that he had something in his mouth, something rather large. When he noticed me looking at it curiously, he proudly dropped it at my feet and rushed off to his breakfast. It took a few seconds to register that what I was looking at was a turtle shell. With blood on it. Just eeewww.

I knew I had to get it out of there before the dogs finished their breakfast, or they were going to put up a bit of resistance to me taking it away. So I grabbed a plastic grocery bag and scooped it up (only touching the thing through the plastic, of course) and took it outside. And in a split second it occurred to me that it might not actually be dead. Perhaps he had done exactly what turtles do to protect themselves and withdrawn into his shell. The blood could very well be TJ's, the result of gnawing on the shell trying to get to the gooey delight inside. Seems like a huge long-shot, but how to know? The thought of a live turtle trapped at the bottom of our garbage can was troubling.

So rather than throwing the "carcass" in the garbage can, I placed the bag on the ground beside the can, turned over on its side. Fast forward a couple of hours, and I go back outside to peek at the back, fully expecting to see a very dead turtle in a plastic bag next to the can. And I find.... nothing. No bag, no turtle. It took a few moments of poking around for me to find the plastic bag, now empty, halfway down the driveway. At first I'm feeling all clever and noble, thinking the turtle walked out of the bag and down the driveway, dragging the bag behind it. Still a possibility. But then I got to wondering if perhaps another neighborhood dog wandered into the yard and fished a nice little treasure out of the bag. So now I'm bummed out, but maybe without reason. I mean, there are not a lot of dogs wandering loose in our neighborhood; it's an upscale area where everyone's very big on fences and leash laws. So I'm going to choose to believe that there's one really lucky turtle out there. I'm going to choose to feel clever and noble, and grateful that the turtle was smart enough to take advantage of a second chance. Nobody gets to feel that way often enough, right?

Got Wood?

I know that sounds dirty. But I'm actually going to talk about wood, or at least comparisons to wood. And a 25-year marriage.

Once upon a time, many years ago, I was dating 2 guys simultaneously. Both great guys in their own ways, both smart, funny and interesting. This was before anyone had heard of AIDS, so I was sleeping with both of them. Pete was a lot more volatile, and so was I. So there were regular blow-ups, huge fights, followed by extraordinary make-up sex. Big Guy was a lot more solid, calmer, patient as a saint, with a great job and a real future. And although they weren't acquainted, they knew about each other. I couldn't decide which one of them to stick it out with. I was just waiting for one of them to ask me to stop seeing the other, but neither of them ever did. I finally had to make a decision.

Ever have a fireplace? People who don't have one don't usually know about the differences between different kinds of wood. Pine, for instance, catches fire fairly easily and burns very hot. It sparks and pops and crackles, and the flames turn all sorts of beautiful colors. As these things go, pine can be a very exciting fire to sit by. But it burns really fast, and then it goes out just as quickly as it started. Oak on the other hand, takes a lot more work to get burning. It builds up to a pretty good heat, but it takes quite a while to get there. You don't get the theatrics you get with pine, no popping or crackling, not very colorful. But once you've gotten it started, it burns fore-freakin'-EVER. Hours and hours. Not terribly exciting, but you'll stay warm, hot even, all night long.

I was explaining that to a friend who had lived his whole life in apartments when I realized I was dating Pine and Oak. The next weekend, I told Pine that he would always have a place in my heart (and he does), but not a place in my future. And 9 months after that, I married Oak. It hasn't always been easy. I'll admit there were times when I wanted to quit, but he wouldn't let me. But he's surprised me with plenty of unexpected excitement along the way. We'll be celebrating our 25th anniversary this fall. And he still keeps me warm. That's one long-burning fire. I wouldn't have it any other way.